NUMBERS

Glancing at a column, my grandfather Max

Knew instantly what they’d add up to.

My grandfather Joe could play chess in his head
And once forced the ghost of Paul Morphy
To accept a draw. My brother at ten
Half invented calculus before finding out
Leibniz and Newton had beaten him to it.
Once, because I missed you greatly,
I discovered a way to square a circle
Which, unfortunately,  I have forgotten.

TALKING WITH GUCKO

Because my brother no longer speaks to him
His imaginary friend Gucko calls me with news
In the hope that I'll pass it on. I don't tell him
That E. isn't talking to me either. I rely
On Foofoo, E.'s other imaginary friend,
For what little I know of him these days.
How fortunate to have had two phantom playmates
So there’s always one to not talk to
And one for company while growing old.

BEAR

Since my brother had cornered the market
In imaginary friends, I made do one summer
With an imaginary associate, seen by appointment.
He was an offwhite polar bear, nearsighted
But impressively big. He sometimes growled
At Gucko and Foofoo when they visited my brother.
To a bear, two year olds are adults. We discussed
Politics and sports. He was frankly critical
Of my taste in clothing and advised me
That eating crayons was unlikely
To impress people or advance my career.

GIFTS

One Christmas Eve my brother
Turned up at my tiny apartment
With the biggest desk I ever saw
Strapped to the top of his VW bug.
(There must have been a contest;
If the car had won, the desk
Would have carried the car
To West 74th Street
And parked it in my living room
Which was also my dining room,
My kitchen, my library
And where the maid would sleep
If I ever hired a maid.)
The apartment door came off its hinges
And, bending the laws of physics,
We barely got the desk inside
We put the table where I ate on top
And a chair. And a floor lamp.
And the marble chess board --
Enormous and impractical -- my brother
Gave me for my birthday that year
Although I don't play chess.
I became known as an eccentric
Who ate on a desk beneath the shade
Of a fair-sized dining room table.