Jeeves exists to thwart Bertie Wooster.
Because of him, Bertie can never
Have a mustache, play the banjolin
Or wear a purple tweed suit with
A too wide green and gold necktie.
If Bertie ever gets engaged
Or starts wondering why he of all men
Should have many fierce aunts and a few
Translucent uncles but no parents at all
Jeeves makes him climb trellises at midnight ,
Or steal silver cow-creamers or has him arrested
To preserve the good name of Honoria Glossop.
At night, Jeeves watches Bertie's dreams
Before he does and excises the scenes
In which Bingo Little or Tuppy Glossop
Says "Bertie, it is you and you alone I love."
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