THE EMPEROR'S GRAVE

When Max the Emperor died his body
Was stowed in a temporary grave
Until, a hundred years later,
The Empire could afford a monument.
Modern research has shown, though,
That the body re-interred with due pomposity
Was not Max's but belonged to a Croatian gypsy
Whose soul gave the canons of the cathedral
Terrible dreams in which he demanded to be freed
Of the load of ill-carved stone on top of him.
Also, he pleaded, he did not much care
For the company of the royal corpses
Buried nearby. Rereburial was unthinkable
But the cathedral officials did their best,
Pulling strings to have Janos the Fiddler
Awarded three medals for services to the state
And posthumously raised to the lower nobility.

MORE ON THE SUBJECT OF AACHEN'S DEAD BISHOPS

The dead bishops of Aachen are quiet folk

Emerging from their sepulchers late at night

To clean up the cathedral.  Done,they gather

Outside, smoking the half-used cigarettes

Tourists crushed when they entered,

And watch the stars slowly disappear.

At dawn, the bell named Leopardus

Tolls gently and the bishops fade away.